Thepopeofastoria’s Weblog

Mr Coxworth wants to know, Who farted?
October 27, 2008, 10:01 pm
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I recently attended my Uncle Neal`s 40th birthday party in New Jersey. I remember Neal as a single man with an apartment in Chicago that served as asylum for a younger Mr. Coxworth. Thats Neal in the chair, with a hangover 40 years in the making slowly sinking in. And those are his two children, Beckett and Grace. Grace was sitting next to me when the camera came on, but as the opportunity for attention arose, so did she. But not without leaving a little present on the couch for me first. I suppose this is a testament to how far I HAVENT come, as I am calling out a five year old for farting.


Smoke on this Shit Ben Corman!
October 17, 2008, 2:13 pm
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I, Mr. Coxworth, am a fan of the written word. Word-smithing I call it. I am also a fan of Rudius Media ( a blogroll run by Ben Corman, that features Tucker Max, Ryan Hoiday, Tard-blog by Riti Sped, and Slow Children at play by Stokey Jaye. So, in an homage to Mr. Corman, I have decided to post cool things that MY friends write. This is a passage from a manuscript by a man named Justin McAneny. Just is still looking for a publisher, sooo……

So Many Stars

It felt like the sun left early that day. The air smelled cold and I wasn’t wearing long sleeves.  The sky was clear and the moon bright.

The stars sat on the top of the mountains.  There were so many stars.  But I lost count at three.

When I would exhale the smoke from my lungs I couldn’t tell when it ended.  I could hear the voices, the laughter in the bar.  Seeing the blackness of the mountains silhouetted against the night sky made me feel small. Looking up at them, I could see the clean snow in the moonlight.

We weren’t down in the valley.  I had never felt so small and comfortable.  I was shivering but I didn’t want to go back inside.  Inside was small.

I lit another cigarette.  As I put my lighter back in my pocket I heard the door open.

“Brian, what are you doing?  Aren’t you cold?  It’s freezing out here,” Adrian said.

I thought for a minute.  “I know.”

“Will you give me a cigarette?” she asked.

“Of course.”  And I stopped.

“So what are you doing out here?”

I thought for a minute and then said, “Just thinking.  Just looking at the mountains.  Where I’m from there aren’t this many stars.”

“Beautiful isn’t it.  I could never leave, Brian.”

I didn’t turn around.

“I know.  It’s hard.  But I have to.”

“Why do you have to?”

“There are things that I want to do.  Things that I have to do … things.”

“What do you want to do?”  She had always known when I was lying.

“I want to tell stories,” I told her, again.  There was annoyance in my voice. We had had this conversation before.

“Why can’t you do it here?”  There was also annoyance in her voice.

“It isn’t right.  Or maybe it is.  I won’t know until I go.”

She put her cigarette out and didn’t say anything.  I didn’t bother turning around and I heard the door slam.  I was alone again.

DiPilla`s Dilemma (or so it would seem.)
October 13, 2008, 11:30 am
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This is a piece I requested froma Nun named STEPHANIE DIPILLA in the Pope`s convent. Though reticent at first, she came `round to share soon enough. Comment at


high school tuck and roll

i like facebook and myspace for various being they help me communicate with old high school friends. conversations of ‘what have you been up to?’ have never been easier.

because if i see you in public…i will avoid you..yes, the ol’ high school tuck and roll..i’m an avoider..i never thought i would be. i had a pleasant high school experience and was friendly with lots of people (very few exceptions) so i never thought i would quietly walk by the clothing rack hoping to dodge someone. but alas, here i am.
there are two very solid reasons why up to this point in my life, i have avoided many people.

a. if you had asked me not too long ago, i would have told you i was unemployed, living at home, no boyfriend and no direction. that reality is something you have to live with everyday and think about everyday….and that’s not definitely something i want to tell someone i haven’t seen in a few years.  because what would i tell you? how depressing would that conversation be? if god forbid i did happen to fall on someone from the past, i would happily change the subject (expert deflector i am) and let them talk about themselves till the cows come home. basically, it would seem to the other person that nothing had changed since i left high school.

b. if you ask me now what i’m up to….well…lol..things have changed..i’m employed (at least twice over), have a boyfriend, have my own apt, and have a direction…except the only problem is that my direction embarrasses me. i have ‘actor’s shame’. i am embarrassed to be an actor. it all comes from society’s view and portrayl of actors. plus, saying you’re an actor here in ny is like saying you’re from america (yes, exactly). it’s really quite weird because i’ve been acting since i was eight years would think i would be fine with it. in layman’s terms, saying you’re an actor is like saying you lay around the house all day in your pjs…it’s that ‘oh why don’t you get a real job’ look or the ‘wow, are you sure you want to be an actor, my cousin…blah blah blah BLAH.’ people don’t really want to hear that you’re an actor unless you’re on broadawy or you were the tree in a production with ethan hawke. i don’t want to tell people because then i would have to explain..i would have to give a rundown of my credits and a brief synopsis of my recent auditions….to actually seem legit. i wish i was an accountant so i can say, ‘yes, i’m an accountant.’
conversation over and done.

so if you’re reading this..and you have noticed me slink behind some kind of tree or HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU…it’s all me…and i’m sorry 😦

What I have Learned about Julie” Nails” Quesada- by Mr Coxworth
October 12, 2008, 1:23 pm
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Things that Julie Quesada doesnt “DO”- by Mr. Coxworth

1. Pictures- ” I hate that picture Joram, thats not me.”

2. White People

3. The Bar- “Too many white people”

4. Hanging out- ‘Cause people always suck and stuff.”

5.Hooking Up-“Cause its supposd to be cool, but it isnt.”

6.MySpace, Facebook, IM,“Thats for boring lonely white men”

7.Vegetables- “They dont taste good.”

8.Flat shoes-“:They`re too flat. I wear heels while I sit on my couch.”

9.Sushi-“Its got the rawness. I dont like that.”

10.Bullshit-“Cause its bullshit.”

11. The Bronx-“Because I live there, and theres too many Latinos.”

12.Girls as friends-“Cause they`re jealous all the time, and they always hate on people.”

13.Lip Reading-“I dont get that. It irritates me, if you wanna talk, then talk, dont do this half assed, read my lips thing.”

14.Tea- ” I need to stop drinking Red Bull, but I cant. I dont do tea, it makes me have to pee a lot. I do coffee but I dont like it, its always hot, I dont like that.”

15. Admitting things she said-” I so did not say that.”

Yes, ….Nails is a strange bird.